You mean I get a break now and then?
I noticed last week that I had become awfully grumpy, which as you can imagine isn't a good thing for a referee. Yes, sure, sometimes becoming a grump is helpful during the course of a game (the, "I'm not taking any more crap" look, followed by the "I'm not taking any more crap" whistle, and, if necessary, "The I'm not going to take any more crap" cards), but last week really burned it into me that I need a break .I'm the first to admit that I have a lower crap threshhold when it comes to coaches - especially when doing youth or kid games. I expect them to be more of a role model (yeah, there's mistake number one), and for some reason, I still get shocked when they scream like there's electrodes attacked to their genitals (internal, external, or otherwise). So, as you can imagine, I tossed one such coach - it really was a pair, but only one took the walk. The strategy was quite innovative, have one coach scream bloody murder, and after the warning, have the other coach do it - I didn't buy it then, and while I can appreciate it more now, don't buy it now. It basically started over a 50-50 ball at the top of the penalty area where both keeper and attacker when it for, followed by them both crashing into each other. In my opinion, not a foul - attacker is going for the ball, keeper is going for the ball - neither of the two are paying attention to anything else - it's what they're both supposed to do in that situation. So the coach starts screaming bloody murder about carding the attacker - loudly - loudly enough that I don't doubt he could be audiable on the other side of the school we were playing at. I was inches (or decibels) away from tossing the coach right then and there (this is where the grumpiness comes in - I'm not sure if this was during the beginning of the season, when I hadn't done 70+ games - which is an entirely different rant - if I would have handled it better) - but instead choose to tell him to shut up, that it wasn't a foul, and I didn't want to hear from the bench again.
My problem is I actually used the phrase "Shut up" - I HAVE seen refs use that phrase, and have it work - and considering how vocal he was, at the time I wanted to make it very clear that further outbursts from him, or players, would not be tolerated. In this case, hindsight isn't quite 20-20, but there obviously was another outburst (from an assistant this time), and one of the coaches took a walk, and I took his pass.
Later that week, I was hastily put on a kids game, after a team I was supposed to AR for didn't show, and the center referee for the kid's game was MIA as well. I was in the complex, I was dressed, and I am not going say that the level of game was too low for me (my god would that be tacky). Although I did say that I hadn't done kids that young before, and I needed a quick going over with rule modifications. Game starts about 20 minutes late (at least by looking at when the other fields finished), and I explain to the coaches that I'm not the scheduled referee, and a quick talk with my ARs about alerting me to any rule modifications I miss. Two things weren't covered - one was that teams can (unlike when they're older - say 13 through 19) sub on any stoppage - ARs caught me on that one, and the other was at near the end of the game: one of the modifications I was told of that all free kicks were indirect (I kind of like this, because god help us if someone that age actually does something maliciously), one that I wasn't told of was that anything in the "penalty area" (there's no PKs at that age group) would be placed on top of the area, instead of at the spot of the foul. Opps. So, white fouls blue in the penalty area, I place the ball at the spot of the foul, and blue arcs the ball up and over the goalkeeper into the goal - well, since everything is indirect, there's no goal, but a goal-kick for white. Meanwhile, the coach for white is yelling and spitting about a terrible call and there's no penalty kicks, and I'm thinking, first-and-foremost, why the hell is this guy yelling - they didn't score, and they didn't have a penalty kick. I give him a quiet verbal warning about carrying when running-past (to avoid actually getting a reply from him - something I learned), but he did carry on. Fortunately, he stopped soon enough, but I was seriously thinking of tossing him (and wondering what the hell was happening to me, when I'm having to consider tossing a coach of players who barely reach my knees).
Well, after the game we're able to talk and come to an undestanding - I didn't get briefed on that rule modification, so it was an honest mistake (one that didn't burn him), and if I didn't show up, he couldn't play his game (the ARs weren't of a high-enough grade to take the center). Considering that normally the referees for his games are 12-to-14, I'm suprised he isn't used to honest mistakes - but then again, I've seen plenty of 12-to-14 year-old refs get abused by coaches - and because the coaches are so much older, the referees just take it.
Maybe that's why my tolerance level is lower for coaches than players - but I also know I despirately need a break - and with the July 4th holiday, I only have games (a U16 and U18) tonight, and nothing for the rest of the week. Thank goodness I decided against doing touraments this year, because I had no idea I'd be doing as many games as I am.